Ask your doctor about nonmedical ways to manage your pain, like massage or acupuncture. You may want to start an exercise routine — exercise releases brain chemicals called endorphins, which can make you feel good. Or you might rather spend time volunteering for a good cause, like an animal shelter or children’s hospital. Whatever it is, new activities can lead to new friends with interests like yours. This may mean that you don’t spend time with someone you used to use drugs with or go somewhere you used to drink. You might take a new way home from work, for example, to keep from going past your favorite old hangout.
They can help motivate a person to remain sober to reach the next milestone. Sobriety can be a fixed-term goal like staying sober for a set period (such as Dry January), or a lifelong goal of staying sober from all substances. Of course, the first change to make if you are serious about a sober lifestyle is to eliminate all wine, spirits, beer, from your home. If you entertain, you will need to let visitors know that if they choose to bring anything to drink they will need to take any leftovers with them when leaving.
This means making a conscious decision to stop using drugs or alcohol and sticking to that decision, no matter what. It’s crucial to understand that getting sober is a process that takes time and effort to achieve long-term recovery. Without recovery tools or a relapse prevention plan, it can be difficult to stay sober while dealing with a significant life setback. Photo by Jeremy Perkins on UnsplashWhen people at treatment centers or in 12-step meetings say that relapse is part of recovery, it turns my stomach.
This can include toxic relationships in which you feel unheard, misunderstood, unsupported, demeaned, unsafe, and/or attacked. You may again seek out the people and situations that support your alcohol use. Some people who move from a controlled and protective setting find themselves awash in the environmental cues that lead to their drinking. Getting sober may seem difficult, but there are strategies you can use to get and maintain sobriety. Some are structured in programs, such as the 12-step approach used by Alcoholics Anonymous and similar addiction recovery programs. There are over 600 community gardens in NYC and it’s a way to beautify a community, improve your diet, get some exercise, connect to the environment and save money on grocery bills, all at the same time.
After the last presidential election, I heard many people in meetings bitterly joke that they were either moving to Canada or having a drink. Luckily, most of them did neither, regaining their focus on the microcosm of their own lives. They focused on what was right in front of them, remembering to take things one day at a time. When people drink or use drugs, it frequently starts as a way to deal with hardships but becomes a primary coping mechanism. Things that happen in life may feel as if they’re too difficult to deal with without the effects of a substance.
A counselor or therapist can help you develop coping skills, improve communication, and work through emotional challenges. Various types of therapy are available, including family and interpersonal therapy. Many of those in the early phase of recovery find it challenging to move from the structured environment of residential rehab directly into independent living. At a sober living home, you can benefit from a house manager who will oversee operations, and you can count on other residents for help as you move toward independent sober living at home. Halfway houses, on the other hand, are typically more structured and may be mandated as part of a court-ordered treatment program.
I don’t mean this to be preachy, but it’s worth saying that if you feel you have a problem with alcohol you can find help here at any time. The end of a relationshipHave you ever heard the story of a person in early recovery who started dating and turned their partner into their higher power? Rather than focus on their own recovery and sanity, they focus on the relationship. What they fail to realize is that whenever recovery becomes supported mainly by a human relationship, the recovery (and usually the relationship) are on thin ice.
As this slow process unfolds, the couple’s lifestyle comes to accommodate drinking as opposed to other activities that once formed a strong part of the bond between them. Shared pleasures that once joined them together becomes less frequent. Intimacy, including sexual intimacy, along with general stamina, may wane. They may falsely attribute these changes to aging, whereas the real culprit may be drinking.
It takes time and effort to regain trust and repair any harm that may have been caused. Be patient and understanding with loved ones who may be hesitant to trust reasons to stay sober again. Identifying triggers and stressors is crucial in preparing for a sober lifestyle.
